Episode 103 Teacher
by Fullelven
Summary: Carths away leaving Revan wide open for some longwithheld anger from Dustil.
1. Everybody's Fool

**Title: Episode 1.03 Teacher**

**Chapter:** **1, Everybody's Fool**

**Author: CarthsLostPadawan**

**Summary: Revan's reeling after having murdered the TSF officer and it seems no one will let her live it down... not even Dustil.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own anything but my dignaty. Leave me be!**

**Dedication: This and every story after this goes out to my dear friends (and fan club) over at Carth Community. I love you guys!**

The blanket wrapped around Revan's upper torso proved to be nothing more than a useless accessory as she stared blankly out the window at the space cruisers humming by. The world was one big shade of gray, the people within it moving through like mindless ghosts to her. Then again, she had to think, maybe it was _she_ who was the mindless ghost. She felt numb, barely aware that she was standing, let alone still breathing. On the other hand, she couldn't find it in her heart to care either way.

Revan had been like this since she woke up the following morning after the _incedent_. In fact, that was all she was able to refer to it as to herself, her mind not capable yet of fully handling the fact that she had taken another innocent human life. Lethargic and apathetic, she haunted the walls of the compartment, leaving a cloud of despair wherever she tred.

_Revan... why fight it? From within you, it devours. And when you finally fall you'll bring down with you chaos and bloodshed once again to this retched Galaxy. _Malak's voice floated from behind her. She could see his reflection in the crystal-clear blaster-proof flas window. This time her eyes met his, locked there, searching. The coal black orbs didn't even reflect light and she had to wonder if it truely was her that had brought him to this.

"I'm not like you Malak." She covered her thoughts with a voice filled more with exhastion than resentment. She was tired, tired of having to fight everyday. That didn't mean, however, that she was ready to throw in the towel and jump shift to the easy team.

_Not like me? Oh Poppet, you do slay me with your words. _Revan flinched inwardly at the remembrance of the old nickname he gave her years ago. _I must conciede though, dearest. Of course you are not like me, but we find that it is the contrary. I am like you because _you _made me. _And though Malak couldn't smile with his prostetic jaw, she could hear the satisfied smirk in his voice.

"I'm not a killer Malak. I'll never be anything near your maliciousness." She stayed with her arguement, as if her saying those words would somehow maker her beleive them. Malak rolled his eyes.

_Ah. You kill not without reason, therefore justifying your actions. I follow in your footsteps blindly and fall victim to both your pretentious lies and your blade. You however, walk away with a new life and a slap on the wrist. Just because it's all in the name of the Republic._ Malak stopped for a moment, moving to her side to life her face to his. And just like that, all the life and emotion returned to Revan and she trembled. _Maybe we should ask the poor fellow who's blood you spilled just yesterday if his death surved the Republic well._

His words stung, but still she repeated. "Nothing like you." Her voice was just a whisper now. She could see her breath in the air, a sign of just how close she and the spectre were. She adverted her eyes to it, using it's wonder as an excuse to turn away from him. It was in this time that the visage of Malak changed, though in his dark robes, he appeared like his light side self. His face resembled the young knight that she had once loved deeply.

_You see, love. I'm the cure to your deepest afflictions. I provide confort and resolution to the chaos inside of you that your fly boy just can't manage to touch. _Revan's head snapped up, her eyes full of fire.

"You **are **the chaos within me, _Lord _Malak." She spat the name with venom and hatred that she didn't know she still possessed. "Of course you're the antidote to my afflictions because you are the sickness that caused them! Carth has nothing to do with this!" Malak only smiled more.

_Oh, but your dear old _Carth_ has everything to do with this and more._ It was his time to speak with loathing, a loathing so strong that even though he was a spectre the air turned redhot around him for a moment at the mention of Carth's name. _Like me, Carth follows you blindly. He let's his heart rule his head. You will destroy him, like you did me. And then it will be he that falls by your blade next. He'll be the one you'll have to save your precious Republic from. You'll ruin another soul with your futile attempts to save this dieing empire, but your cycle will continue in the good name of the Republic!_ Revan moved to slap him, finding her hand went straight through the ethreal vision. How was it that he could touch her as if he were flesh and blood and bone, but she couldn't even brush his skin?

Their reunion was short lived however, as Dustil stormed his way into the room. Malak vanished on cue without notice from Revan or Dustil both. She turned towards the estranged youth and for a moment, neither spoke. He just leered at her with the same kind of look she had given Malak not two minutes earlier. Once she found her voice, she spoke with a strain. "Carth's not here."

Dustil scoffed dramatically, a dark air beginning to surround him like the one he had given off back on Korriban. Anger, frustration, confusion... it all raged inside the young Onasi and surged off him in wafts of energy, screwing with Revan's already conflicted emotions. "Imagin that, Father's gone once again. Should have known his 'lets be a family again' speech back on Korriban was a crock of Bantha poo-doo."

"Dustil, you know your father wants to build a relationship with you. You're just overreacting." The sudden lack of compassion from Revan wasn't helping the situation any, but she was emotionally worn and couldn't find the strength within her to care. She did note, though, the sudden change in the stressed Force Adept was strange and unsettling.

"You think _you _know Father? You don't even know yourself!" Dustil's comment went straight through Revan's heart, leaving her wounded. Her face had shown it and a feeling of rejected tears found their way to her eyes. She wouldn't shed them though, he pride had been broken once today. It wouldn't happen again. "Father's a deserter." He continued. "Always ready to skip off and play hero, but never a husband and definately never a father."

Revan said nothing, she couldn't. The pain and anguish in Dustil's overall attitude wouldn't allow her. She couldn't even remember her parents, nevermind a similar situation. She had no grounds to defend Carth... so she went with the generic. "Your father loves you Dustil. And he loved your mother, you know that!" Her shot was futile, but all she could muster against the oddly enraged man.

"He _loved_ Mother, but he couldn't save her! No, back then his only love was work, he had no time for family. He was constantly sent away because of you!" His eyes were fierce and for once it was clear that he had never truely blamed Carth for what happened to their once happy home. He had blamed _Revan_. He advanced on her, eyes full of emotion, his hands shaking. Revan picked up another feeling from him... _fear._

"I didn't-"

"No! It was _you_ who lead him through the Mandalorian Wars while my mother struggled to care for me with no help, no Credits. It was _you _ Father was fighting during the begining of the Jedi Civil war when Mother was getting sick. And when you caused the attack on this planet, Father was gone trying to stop you elsewhere and couldn't save Mother or his baby she was carrying!" He screamed the last part as if it was a century old secret that he'd been dying to make known. Revan blinked at him.

"Carth never mentioned another child..." Her voice was soft, distant. Dustil just sneered.

"He couldn't very well mention something he never knew about!" His voice was reverberating off the metal walls. "I never had a little brother, I never had a family, because of _you_! And even as we speak now, Father's off cleaning up another one of your messes!" Revan furrowed her brow to Dustil, her face screwed up in deep thought. Before she could draw any conclusions Dustil continued. "Don't play stupid, I saw you kill that TSF officer!"

Her face paled as she stared at him, words far from an option. She felt sick to her stomach again, it dropping plum into her feet. In her mind, she could see herself killing the defenseless man over and over again until it became too much for her. "I AM NOT A MURDERER!" She screamed suddenly, the force of her outburst rocking even Dustil to the core.

Dustil, taken off guard, drew his long sword defensively though agression showed in his eyes. It wasn't in his purogative to hurt her, but in his mind she was unstable. Definately capable of taking him. "I saw you kill the officer. You passed out, I hid the body, and drug you back here. Father's a fool, so fabricating a story to cover you." He moved a little closer, wanting to make sure he was calling the shots before he continued. "Now I'll swear not to tell Father if you promise to do me one thing."

"What?" Revan's voice was odd sounding to her own ears, mousey even. In any event, Dustil knew he held the high card.

"Train me. Teach me everything you know, Force, combat, and otherwise." His conditios were simple and definately no what Revan had epected to hear.

"What will you get from it?" Dustil only smiled.

"Simple. If I learn everything you know, then when you go back to your old self..." Dustil paused, lowering his voice and running his blade in a cut-throat action across his neck. "I can kill you." His words chilled Revan to th ebone, but part of her agreed with him. Why not have a failsafe in case things got ugly? There wasn't one she knew alive that could best her at anything. And she wasn't being concieded in thinking so. After a long while, Revan gave him a solemn nod.

Maybe this was just the thing she needed, if she could be trusted alone, in combat, with another human life.

**Sorry it took so long guys! But since I'm in ISS right now, I can crank these out no problem. I've got two more days left, so if you have any ideas for the remaining chapters, let me know!**


	2. Freak On A Leash

**Chapter: 2, Freak on a Leash**

**Author: CarthsLostPadawan**

**Summary:** **Training with Dustil is bringing back memories of the end of the Mandalorian Wars. Stress of that and Dustil's constant hatred is wearing heavy on the former Sith Lord's soul as something else seems to be eating her from the inside.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything but... er... no. Don't own anything, sorry!**

**Dedication: To my Carth Community buds who're waiting very patiently for this and for Brenda. For some reason when she came back so did my muse!**

_"Do you see it Malak? The Republic is weak. It was weak and failing even before the war. That's why the Mandalorians attacked. This... Star Forge... we could go back to the Republic and save it! I don't think they'll listen to reason, but maybe we can scare them into giving us the power." Revan looked down at all the ships currently being created. Sure it was only three or four an hour, but it seemed like its resources were endless. And an infinate factory in any war is a sure fire victory for their side._

_"Why prolong the damnation of a doomed Galaxy? We can take them and end their suffering. We could rule over it as a King and Queen... make everything how _we _want it to be!" Malak spoke, his robotic voice sounding dark through the prostetic jaw. _

_Revan turned to him, placing a gentle hand on his upper cheek and rubbing her thumb lovingly over his eyebrow. She missed the sandy brown hair that she used to run her slender fingers through, burrowing her face in it and breathing him in. It was all shaved, all that was left were short stubbles sculpted into war markings. Everything about Malak had changed in that battle where he lost his jaw. Hw was bitter and vengeful now, so different from the Malak she had known._

_"Don't look at me like that, Revan. Your sympathy burns my skin. I dont stare at the dark veins that spider your moonlit skin or the blinding silver of her eyes with sadness and sorrow. I do so with adoration of my lover, my avenger, and my poppet." He returned the touch to her face, letting his thumb linger softly on her chin almost longingly before he turned suddenly and started to stalk out the door. "I'm going to go talk to Admiral Karath and make sure he's still on board for this. See if he can talk his troops into joining up."_

_Revan watched after him, grabbing the steel war mask she had found in a storage room on the Star Forge. "My outside you love so much mirrors the inside of me that I hate so much." She placed the mask on and pulled up her hood, letting out an inward sigh. She knew full well what had to be done and any remnant of the Revan of old died when she put the mask on. A new war lurked on the horizon, but it was one of restoration though the blind and brainwashed would see it as treason. The Republic needed to be saved and it was up to her to fix them... no matter how many had to die for her cause. A life was little to sacrifice for the greater good, right? "I'm sorry, but it's for your own good." She whispered taking one last look to the observation deck._

_She was to go rally the troops. Those who stayed started training immediately... death to all the deviants._

----------

A blue haze nearly took Revan's ear off had she not come to and moved just then. Dustil was savagely swinging his lightsaber at her in wide arcs as if he was out for blood. _Which he is... and I'm not sure I can say that I blame him._

Revan retaliated easily, de-igniting her lightsaber just as it would enter his chest wait the jab she made and sharply jerked it so that she knocked his hand and called it to herself. Dustil fumed. "Space! What am I doing wrong?!" He cried exasperated as she tossed his saber back to him. He caught it no problem and sheathed it with a scowl.

"You're going out for the kill! There's no finess in your style, but you're swinging like a mynock locked in a plasteel container! It's wreckless and every move you make leaves you open for three different retaliations." She preached taking a moment to sit down and catch her breath on an equipment case within the hangar. Dustil simply glared daggers at her as he put his lightsaber in its holder and rested his back against a nearby wall. The way he crossed his arms across his chest and scowled made Revan wonder if Dustil looked like that when he pouted as a boy.

Revan sighed again. Even though Dustil was a good five to six feet way from her, she could feel the utter hatred just rolling off him. "I know you hate me Dustil. And you've got every right to. I hate myself for every bit of bad that I've done. But even in all my anger and stupidity, I never once left myself open to attack."

"You did too leave yourself open. Malak brought you down and usurped the mantle of Dark Lord without much of a problem." Dustil argued and his every word stabbed Revan deeper than he knew.

"Right. Well... that's all for today. I believe Carth is going to be off early today. Why don't you head home to see him?" Revan's voice was void of all emotion as she walked past him towards the Ebon Hawk. Dustil watched her, his senses finally picking up on the pain inside her.

"Where are you going Revan?" He questioned about ready to follow her. She stopped, not turning to make any visual contact with him at all.

"The ship. To work on the droids." Once again continuing to walk, she didn't stop again until the hatch closed behind her and she was finally away from Dustil's eyes. And then she lost it.

Revan's legs were like jelly as she fell to the floor just inside the entrance of the Ebon Hawk. Sobs wracked her body with such fierocity that she though they might tear her fragile frame apart. Her breathing was labored, catching short choppy breaths between cries of pain... inward pain. And anguish. Anger and seething hatered that she felt for herself, for her past, for the person she once was. _And very well could still possibly be. _She reminded.

After what seemed like an eternity to her, she soft sounds of mechanical gears whirling hastened to her ears and without looking up she already knew who it was. **_Beep! Bee-dup Beep Deet! Droo._** Quickly wiping the tears from her eyes she lifted her reddened face to smile softly at her T3-M4 Astromech droid. Hovering over to her, it nuzzled her in a way only a trashcan-shaped droid could manage.

"I'm fine T3. No, Carth and I didn't have a fight." She replied reassuringly as if a parent was telling thier worried child that they weren't going to get a divorce. Finding the strength within her somewhere, she stood and shook off the few remaining tears waiting to spill.

**_Doo deet, boop? _**It pressed and she let out a little chuckle and absently polished one of its sensors on its top. It was amaising just how human-like it was for an Astromech droid. It seemed to be very in tune with her nature and emotions. She patted him with a smile as another set of footprints padded from the hallway.

"Statement: The Mandalorian is requesting council with you over the com. Question: Would you like for me to tell him you are busy or may I simply shoot the beeping annoyance?" HK-47 announced in his all-too prominent annoyed arristocratic tone. Revan moved for a moment as to go intercept it and then thought against it suddenly. _Maybe I could use a change of scenery..._

"No. HK, tell Canderous that I'll be coming to him and to have the hangar bay ready for me. And let him know I'm coming solo." If he had been human, Revan thought she could have sworn that he sighed.

"Irritated Remark: But Master, you can talk to the irritating Mandalorian yourself. You built me as an assassin droid, not one of those sissy ambassidor droids." Revan shot him a look, however, and HK changed his tune. "Addition: But since you are my _darling_ Master, I will do your bidding." There was obvious disdain in his voice as he shuffled off for the communications room, but Revan simply turned to look at the enterance hatch with a renewed spirit.

_Forgive me, Carth, but I just need some time to myself for awhile. _

**((Sorry it's taken me so long to get another chapter up. I just seems like I had lost my muse there for awhile. But I'm better now! Tell me what you think!))**


	3. Friends In Low Places

**Chapter:**** 3, Friends in Low Places**

**Author:**** CarthsLostPadawan**

**Summary:** **Revan's losing it and with Dustil's words hitting close to home, she decides to answer Canderous's call with a personal meeting... without telling Carth.**

**Disclaimer:**** I owe this disclaimer, but that's about it.**

**Dedication:**** My collabing buddies, this one's for you. Especially you Wolfie!! **

"I just... I don't understand how you can just up and leave without saying a word to me. I know I have been busy, but that's no reason to take off, Revan," Carth's voice pleaded through the communicator. Revan couldn't even meet his eyes, despite the fact that it was a screen she was looking at and he was a couple hundred lightyears away.

Despite the fact that she knew he wasn't laying a guilt trip on her, she still felt like the Galaxy's most sorry excuse for a girlfriend. She ran her fingers through her auburn locks, blinking her navy-hued eyes to keep a fresh batch of tears at bay. "This was just something I had to do, Carth. Don't worry about me, please..."

"If Dustil said something to you Revan..." His honey brown orbs gazed seriously at her. "Tell me now and I will get this fixed. You shouldn't have to feel unwelcome here, this is your home too."

"No! I mean..." She sighed heavily, leaning her head on her hands. "Carth, the kid needs you and me being there at the moment is getting in the way of that. Just... spend some time with him when you're not working. Dustil needs a father right now more than he needs guidance in the Force."

"Statement: We are nearing the atmosphere of Dxun, Master. Query: Would you like me to do some other remedial tasks for you that are outside of the assassination protocol that you programmed me for or will you put the landing gear down yourself?" HK-47's mechanical voice echoed out behind her.

_Great... and now Carth knows just exactly where I took off to. _She thought to herself just before Carth's questions began to ring out from the other side.

"Dxun, Revan what's on Dxun that you could possibly need?" Revan stood, reaching out to touch his cheek on the screen, smiling softly.

"I will see you in a few days, Carth. I'm sorry..." With a simple press of a button, the screen went blank, ending her transmission between herself and Carth. Inwardly, she prayed that she was making the right decision as she headed to the cockpit to prepare their landing.

--

_Rain fell down in a torrential downpour, though the fires still burned relentlessly. Shrapnel sailed like daggers through the air, embedding those soldiers not wearing gear strong enough to keep it at bay. Revan sidestepped a Jedi just as they fell to her feet, a smoldering hole where their heart once beat. Casualties were not only heard of in war, they were expected, demanded by the Gods of Fate to keep their rage going until their will could be completed and the other side faltered._

_She hadn't known the lad, not even bothered to get his name when she'd recruited him fresh from his trials at the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. She nosed his limp form with the toe of her boot and shook her head. "You there. Grab his saber, you may need it later!" She called out to the Knight who had been fighting beside him. He gazed questioningly at his leader, unable to see through the mask that hid her scar and vein ridden skin. Despite that, as she just stared back, he knew better than to question orders and retrieved his saber._

_In all rights, Revan shouldn't have even been down in this. She should have been up in her flagship, bombing from above. However, today her heart pounded for a new sort of adventure and as she tiptoed through the corpses she realized this was what she craved... _

_She craved the battle._

_Her viridian colored double-bladed saber ignited in an instant, she twirling it before her as blaster bolts deflected left and right. Despite the numerous amount of charges being shot at her, she could sense it already, just a lone shooter through the smoke and darkness. She continued her trek towards him, an explosion to her right causing the ground to shake tremendously as a pillar of fire rose high in the air._

_There were screams, a plane had gone down and those not killed in the explosion were burning alive not three feet from her. But her mind didn't falter. No, it remained on that lone assailant that now seemed to be a bit disheveled at the way she walked calmly towards him as if she wasn't a part of this war around her. She was displaced..._

_And it was as her saber finally found a home resting in his chest that he knew that he had died with something he had worked his whole life towards. Falling against a worthy opponent in the heat of battle. Coughing as Revan removed his helmet to gaze upon his face, the teenage boy only smiled weakly and thanked her. _

--

Hands gripped the railing in a white-knuckle hold as she descended the ramp and into the crisp air of Onderon's forest moon. Her heart sped with every little step of the way, the sounds of ghastly gun shots and explosions seeming to whiz past her ear with the mere sight of the fields she once battled on. Strangely enough, it seemed fitting that on her first trip back to Dxun she would be meeting up once again with the Mandalorians, not as an enemy, but as a respected ally.

"Revan!" The familiar gruff voice called, snapping her from her thoughts. She didn't have much time to think before she felt herself being roughly pulled into something that could possibly be called an embrace by who she only surmised was the newest Mandalore.

"Canderous..." She strained to hug him through being crushed into his armor. "I'm happy to see you, but keep squeezing me and I think I just may become one with your suit."

He chuckled, pulling her away from him so that he could look her over. "You look like hell, kid." She gave him a look, causing him to step back from her, hands up in a no-offense sort of way. "Hey, you know I call them like I see them. And you look like you've been trampled by a Bantha."

She offered a half smile, laying against him heavily as she finished descending the ramp and stepped foot into the thick grass. "Long flight will do that, I suppose," Revan began though his words seemed to remind her just how shaky she was feeling... and nauseated.

"Well, we'll get you back to the base camp and you can sleep that off before I show you around the place. Its barren, but its home." He started off towards the escort that he had brought with him, their speeders still humming in wait. However, Revan didn't follow.

"Canderous?"

He paused. "What?"

"Catch me," she murmured weakly just as her knees buckled. She reached for him, he catching her arm as her world faded to black.

**(( Oooh, how's that for another open ending? I know I keep saying I'm going to write on this more often and then I get sidetracked, lol. Hopefully that won't be the case this time!! ))**


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